98 replies to this topic

[sylvester]

My favorite:

Mark Twain:

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

And one offered by headmelter who put the thread idea into my head...

To borrow a phrase from Yeats:

"All has changed, changed utterly,

A terrible beauty is born. "

Oh and the Oppenheimer quote from the other day:

"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds"

[id5]

"If you fly it, float it or fuck it, rent it, it's cheaper!"

Felix Dennis

[Steve Netwriter]

"Oh no, not again" - the whale

[sylvester]

"Oh no, not again" - the whale

  

Crude but funny:
[to one of the prostitutes at Cleveland's house]: "So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?" - Stewie from Family Guy

[Ologhai Jones]

"Oh no, not again" - the whale

Wasn't that the bowl of petunias?

And, as to a quote, something that reminds me of myself trying to read tons of material on finance and economy:

"I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia." --Woody Allen.

[sylvester]

Wasn't that the bowl of petunias?

And, as to a quote, something that reminds me of myself trying to read tons of material on finance and economy:

"I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia." --Woody Allen.

Ologhai's right you know (I thought it was the whale too but...)

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this record of its thoughts from the moment of its "birth" to the moment of its death:

Ah! What's happening? it thought.
Er, excuse me, who am I?
Hello?
Why am I here? What's my purpose in life?
What do I mean by who am I?
Calm down, get a grip now . . . oh! this is an interesting sensation, what is it? It's sort of . . . yawning, tingling sensation in my . . . my . . . well, I suppose I'd better start finding names for things if I want to make headway in what for the sake of what I shall call an argument I shall call the world, so let's call it my stomach.
Good. Ooooh, it's getting quite strong. And hey, what about that whistling roaring sound going past what I'm suddenly going to call my head? Perhaps I can call that . . . wind! Is that a good name? It'll do . . . perhaps I can find a better name for it later when I've found out what it's for. It must be something very important because there certainly seems to be a hell of a lot of it. Hey! What's this thing? This . . . let's call it a tail - yeah, tail. Hey! I can really thrash it about pretty good, can't I? Wow! Wow! That feels great! Doesn't seem to achieve very much but I'll probably find out what it's for later on. Now, have I built up any coherent picture of things yet?
No.
Never mind, hey, this is really exciting, so much to find out about, so much to look forward to, I'm quite dizzy with anticipation . . .
Or is it the wind?
There really is a lot of that now, isn't there?
And wow! Hey! What's this thing suddenly coming toward me very fast? Very, very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide-sounding name like . . . ow . . . ound . . . round . . . ground! That's it! That's a good name - ground!
I wonder if it will be friends with me?

And the rest, after a sudden wet thud, was silence.

[riggerbeautz]

He who rejects change is the architect of decay.  The only human institution which rejects progress is the cemetery.  
Harold Wilson

[Steve Netwriter]

  

Yes, of course !

It's been a while. You can't expect me to remember something accurately from 2 decades ago  

Now you're going to tell me it was last week  

[sylvester]

  

Yes, of course !

It's been a while. You can't expect me to remember something accurately from 2 decades ago  

Now you're going to tell me it was last week  

No, that would be improbable

[Steve Netwriter]

Do you mean infinitely improbable     

[riggerbeautz]

  

Yes, of course !

It's been a while. You can't expect me to remember something accurately from 2 decades ago  

Now you're going to tell me it was last week  

Nah, but all psychology bull prints it, though i can hear those dulcit tones delivering it  

[BillyPilgrim]

"When I was young my dad said to me "Son. Remember these three words and you'll never be broke...."Stick 'em up."" "

David "Devilfish" Ulliott

[THEBIGMAN]

Always keep tubes of Preparation H and Deep-Heat-Fiery-Jack-Industrial-Strength-Muscle-Rub very well separated in your bathroom cabinet.

[bonobo]

"It is in the nature of things that you can never escape one setback without running into another."
Machiavelli

One for HankyPanky Paulson to ponder on

[Steve Netwriter]

Might as well put this here:

The W. $200 bill. Takes the place of the old $100. Says $200 on the bill, but only buys $100 worth of stuff.

http://www.talkdelaware.com/f67/man-succes...-bill-8405.html

Man Successfully Used a $200 bill
Posted: Jun. 1, 2007 10:55 a.m.
Updated: Aug. 6, 2007 2:26 a.m.
HALIFAX COUNTY: North Carolina cops are searching for a guy who successfully passed a $200 bill bearing George W. Bush's portrait and a drawing of the White House complete with lawn signs reading "We like ice cream" and "USA deserves a tax cut." The phony Bush bill was presented to a cashier at a Food Lion in Roanoke Rapids on September 6 by an unidentified male who was seeking to pay for $150 in groceries. Remarkably, the cashier accepted the counterfeit note and gave the man $50 change. In a separate incident involving a different perp, Roanoke Rapids cops Tuesday arrested Michael Harris, 24, for attempting last month to pass an identical $200 Bush bill at a convenience store.

  

[id5]

My all time favourite  

"No more boom or bust"
Gordon Brown

[tazer]

One day, they will have sold us so much that we will not have any money left.  
And then they will own us.

Dunno who said that..dunno why I remember it..

[lowrentyieldmakessense(honest!)]

Thomas Jefferson.

I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing
armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their
currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow
up around [the banks] will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up
homeless on the continent their fathers conquered.

[tbatst]

in this ever-changing world in which we live in

Paul McCartney proving that you can never have enough prepositions in a sentence.

[sossij]

"Intellectual brilliance is no guarantee against being dead wrong" - Carl Sagan

"Always poo before you shower" - me